it is not the body…it is not the mind…it is not the emotions
it is not the astral or the six subtle bodies linked to this body
it is free of form…a pure witness

first five centres are only for developing growing and crystalisation
leading to awareness
where there is the experiencer and the experienced…a duality

reaching the sixth centre
where for the first time one becomes aware of awareness itself
the state of experiencing…non duality

the seventh…a no centre…where the state of experiencing
has drowned into a pure witness
nothingness…the void

i went deeper and deeper diving into mysteries that were opening to me
and bhagwan appears again and again to bless me
mysteriously and mischievously hovering over me to see if i am alert
and i can feel his silent presence

his humour and lightness make me giggle and laugh with delight
i am lightening up…a new sense of humour growing in me
i begin to see the absurdities of human nature
the simplicity and beauty of all that surrounds me

his eye sees all
this is an open sky i am living under

bhagwan understands deeply my right to total privacy
and i was beginning to learn to regard others privacy
in my psychic experiences of others who came in front of me
i remained silent to whatever i saw
and never judged anyone

bhagwan has immense regard for individual freedom
freedom is his golden key
if i want to be unconscious it is my freedom
i can grow at my own relaxed pace
no rush…no hurry to dive hara kiri method anymore
just relax and enjoy the breeze

the journey is the goal
infact there is no goal
just the sheer beauty of the journey itself

my inner guilt and pain of gautama the buddha descent evaporate
i am being lovingly and compassionately guided by bhagwan
his wisdom and clarity of understanding
he is healing me with his loving touch

understanding bhagwans method of instant enlightenment
or the schools of gradual enlightenment

it is clear that bhagwan is perfectly right
that enlightenment is sudden
without this first sudden experience of superconsciousness
nothing is possible

and thereafter
a gradual awakening of superconsciousness to cosmic consciousness
dissolving into the final state
the gradual method of enlightenment is simply ridiculous
a postponement
one simply remains in the shell forever

my understanding of sannyasins was deep and clear
that there were six billion people on this planet earth
just one million were his disciples
that bhagwan had chosen his disciples
he knew each sannyasins potentiality
his vast vision saw far far ahead

that these brave and rare individuals
have each in their own way broken away from the mould
suffering isolation from family friends and society…financial difficulties

that they were all here for the love of bhagwan
had the courage to fall at his feet and take sannyas
they had earned my love respect and gratitude

i would judge them to be my loving friends and fellow travellers